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New Content Tagged with
reading
11 months ago
He's getting tricked right into education
Laughing all the way to the bank. But he can't be in it for money alone surely? Maybe evil and mischief are also on the list?
Here re 5 ways your kid can use literacy and eloquence for evil purposes:
"The Homework Hustler": Offer to write essays or complete assignments for your classmates in exchange for their lunch money or prized possessions. Who needs to study when you can outsource your work and rake in the rewards?
"The Classroom Con Artist": Manipulate your teacher into giving you preferential treatment by crafting persuasive arguments and sob stories. Convince them that you deserve extra credit or leniency on assignments, even if you haven't earned it.
"The Fake News Fabricator": Write and circulate fake news articles or rumors within your school or community to sow chaos and confusion. Use your eloquence to convince others of the authenticity of your stories, causing mayhem and mistrust.
"The Blackmailing Wordsmith": Use your knowledge of others' secrets to blackmail them into doing your bidding. Write anonymous letters or threats, leveraging your ability to craft persuasive messages to intimidate or manipulate your peers.
"The Literary Saboteur": Spread rumors or lies about your rivals or enemies through anonymous letters or social media posts, using your eloquence to damage their reputations or relationships. Who needs fists when words can be just as damaging?
Here re 5 ways your kid can use literacy and eloquence for evil purposes:
"The Homework Hustler": Offer to write essays or complete assignments for your classmates in exchange for their lunch money or prized possessions. Who needs to study when you can outsource your work and rake in the rewards?
"The Classroom Con Artist": Manipulate your teacher into giving you preferential treatment by crafting persuasive arguments and sob stories. Convince them that you deserve extra credit or leniency on assignments, even if you haven't earned it.
"The Fake News Fabricator": Write and circulate fake news articles or rumors within your school or community to sow chaos and confusion. Use your eloquence to convince others of the authenticity of your stories, causing mayhem and mistrust.
"The Blackmailing Wordsmith": Use your knowledge of others' secrets to blackmail them into doing your bidding. Write anonymous letters or threats, leveraging your ability to craft persuasive messages to intimidate or manipulate your peers.
"The Literary Saboteur": Spread rumors or lies about your rivals or enemies through anonymous letters or social media posts, using your eloquence to damage their reputations or relationships. Who needs fists when words can be just as damaging?
11 months ago
Literacy changes a man
He read her deranged texts and finally saw the red flags.
Maybe don't teach your boyfriend how to read there might be downsides! We thought up a few:
He starts correcting your texts like he's the grammar police: Suddenly, every "your" and "you're" is up for scrutiny, and he proudly announces he's the spelling champion of your relationship.
He discovers the joy of reading... your embarrassing old diaries: You thought those cringe-worthy entries were safely tucked away, but now he's quoting them at family gatherings. Thanks, literacy.
He develops an obsession with instruction manuals: Suddenly, he's reading the fine print on everything from cereal boxes to toilet cleaner, and you can forget about romantic bedtime stories.
You lose your monopoly on Netflix subtitles: Now, he's pausing every two seconds to read the subtitles, claiming it's for "educational purposes." Your binge-watching experience will never be the same.
He joins a book club and becomes a literary snob: You used to bond over trashy reality TV, but now he's discussing Dostoevsky and Proust like they're old pals. Who knew literacy came with such pretentiousness?
Maybe don't teach your boyfriend how to read there might be downsides! We thought up a few:
He starts correcting your texts like he's the grammar police: Suddenly, every "your" and "you're" is up for scrutiny, and he proudly announces he's the spelling champion of your relationship.
He discovers the joy of reading... your embarrassing old diaries: You thought those cringe-worthy entries were safely tucked away, but now he's quoting them at family gatherings. Thanks, literacy.
He develops an obsession with instruction manuals: Suddenly, he's reading the fine print on everything from cereal boxes to toilet cleaner, and you can forget about romantic bedtime stories.
You lose your monopoly on Netflix subtitles: Now, he's pausing every two seconds to read the subtitles, claiming it's for "educational purposes." Your binge-watching experience will never be the same.
He joins a book club and becomes a literary snob: You used to bond over trashy reality TV, but now he's discussing Dostoevsky and Proust like they're old pals. Who knew literacy came with such pretentiousness?