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10 months ago
12 months ago
More honesty then i'm ready to deal with
Seems these tests are really accurate lately. I've listed some of my talents below
The "Procrastination Prodigy":
"I've mastered the art of procrastination so well that I even procrastinate on procrastinating."
The "Recipe Ruiner" Reality:
"I can burn water. If there's a way to mess up a recipe, you can bet I'll find it."
The "Bedhead Boss" Blunder:
"I wake up looking like I just wrestled a tornado... and lost."
The "Tech Troublemaker" Tale:
"I'm the reason 'turn it off and on again' is the go-to tech support solution – because I break things just by looking at them."
The "Talentless Twirl" Tragedy:
"I dance like a giraffe on roller skates... with two left feet."
The "Procrastination Prodigy":
"I've mastered the art of procrastination so well that I even procrastinate on procrastinating."
The "Recipe Ruiner" Reality:
"I can burn water. If there's a way to mess up a recipe, you can bet I'll find it."
The "Bedhead Boss" Blunder:
"I wake up looking like I just wrestled a tornado... and lost."
The "Tech Troublemaker" Tale:
"I'm the reason 'turn it off and on again' is the go-to tech support solution – because I break things just by looking at them."
The "Talentless Twirl" Tragedy:
"I dance like a giraffe on roller skates... with two left feet."
12 months ago
How to deal with unsolicited flirting
Pretty cheap for real rent, really expensive for digital rent. A great idea though, maybe unsolicited DM senders should pay rent! Here's 5 fun reasons why:
"The DM Landlord": Just like any landlord, you should be compensated for letting people move into your DMs. After all, you're providing prime real estate in the digital world—it's only fair that they chip in for the privilege!
"The Inbox Intrusion Fee": Think of it as an inbox intrusion fee. Every time someone slides into your DMs uninvited, they're essentially trespassing on your digital property. Charging rent is just a way to recoup the costs of dealing with their unsolicited messages.
"The Message Maintenance Tax": Maintaining your DMs takes time and effort. From sorting through spam to dealing with unwanted advances, it's a thankless task. Charging rent is a way to compensate for the emotional labor of managing your inbox.
"The Spam Surcharge": Unsolicited DMs are the digital equivalent of junk mail. Just like you wouldn't let someone dump their trash in your living room for free, you shouldn't have to deal with their digital garbage without compensation. Charging rent is a way to discourage spam and keep your DMs clean.
"The Privacy Protection Payment": Your DMs are your private digital sanctuary, and letting someone slide into them uninvited is like letting a stranger crash on your couch without asking. Charging rent is a way to assert your digital boundaries and protect your privacy. After all, if they want access to your DMs, they should be willing to pay for the privilege!
"The DM Landlord": Just like any landlord, you should be compensated for letting people move into your DMs. After all, you're providing prime real estate in the digital world—it's only fair that they chip in for the privilege!
"The Inbox Intrusion Fee": Think of it as an inbox intrusion fee. Every time someone slides into your DMs uninvited, they're essentially trespassing on your digital property. Charging rent is just a way to recoup the costs of dealing with their unsolicited messages.
"The Message Maintenance Tax": Maintaining your DMs takes time and effort. From sorting through spam to dealing with unwanted advances, it's a thankless task. Charging rent is a way to compensate for the emotional labor of managing your inbox.
"The Spam Surcharge": Unsolicited DMs are the digital equivalent of junk mail. Just like you wouldn't let someone dump their trash in your living room for free, you shouldn't have to deal with their digital garbage without compensation. Charging rent is a way to discourage spam and keep your DMs clean.
"The Privacy Protection Payment": Your DMs are your private digital sanctuary, and letting someone slide into them uninvited is like letting a stranger crash on your couch without asking. Charging rent is a way to assert your digital boundaries and protect your privacy. After all, if they want access to your DMs, they should be willing to pay for the privilege!
12 months ago
Nature is healing
Onlyfans awaits them with open arms. Realtors suck and overcharge us in an already horrible housing market. They should get other jobs and here is why:
"The Houseplant Hypocrisy": Realtors should find other jobs because they spend more time watering houseplants at open houses than actually closing deals. Who needs a realtor when you can have a part-time botanist?
"The Door-to-Door Drama Queen": Realtors should find other jobs because they're tired of getting chased off porches by angry homeowners mistaking them for aggressive salespeople. Who needs door-to-door sales when you can have door-to-door hide-and-seek?
"The Open House Opera Singer": Realtors should find other jobs because their rendition of "Home, Sweet Home" at every open house is driving away potential buyers faster than you can say "foreclosure." Who needs real estate when you can have real estate karaoke?
"The Property Porn Ploy": Realtors should find other jobs because they spend more time scrolling through listings on Zillow than actually showing houses. Who needs a realtor when you can have a professional property stalker?
"The Keyless Conundrum": Realtors should find other jobs because they're tired of misplacing the keys to every house they're supposed to show. Who needs keys when you can have a universal "open sesame" spell?
"The Houseplant Hypocrisy": Realtors should find other jobs because they spend more time watering houseplants at open houses than actually closing deals. Who needs a realtor when you can have a part-time botanist?
"The Door-to-Door Drama Queen": Realtors should find other jobs because they're tired of getting chased off porches by angry homeowners mistaking them for aggressive salespeople. Who needs door-to-door sales when you can have door-to-door hide-and-seek?
"The Open House Opera Singer": Realtors should find other jobs because their rendition of "Home, Sweet Home" at every open house is driving away potential buyers faster than you can say "foreclosure." Who needs real estate when you can have real estate karaoke?
"The Property Porn Ploy": Realtors should find other jobs because they spend more time scrolling through listings on Zillow than actually showing houses. Who needs a realtor when you can have a professional property stalker?
"The Keyless Conundrum": Realtors should find other jobs because they're tired of misplacing the keys to every house they're supposed to show. Who needs keys when you can have a universal "open sesame" spell?
9 months ago
10 months ago
