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2 years ago
2 years ago
2 years ago
2 years ago
2 years ago
2 years ago
The Seaguls don't work for us
Even if they did I'd assume you wouldn't legally have to pay them. But what if they DID work for you? Taxes pension and full seagull employee benefits?
Here's what we would do if we ran a fry stand and our seagull employees stole customers food:
The Seagull Stockade: Construct a tiny bird-sized stockade on the beach and publicly shame the offending seagulls by locking them up for all to see. Bonus points for adding tiny "Wanted" posters with their mugshots plastered all over town.
The Seagull Sensitivity Training: Enroll the mischievous seagulls in a mandatory sensitivity training program to teach them the importance of respecting personal property and boundaries. It's time they learned that stealing fries is not a victimless crime!
The Seagull Hair Salon: Transform the pesky seagulls into fashion icons by giving them outrageous makeovers at the local bird salon. Picture seagulls strutting down the boardwalk with brightly colored feathers and stylish accessories, too fabulous to bother with stealing fries.
The Seagull Scarecrow Squad: Recruit a team of scarecrows dressed in beach attire to patrol the coastline and keep the seagulls in check. With their menacing stares and exaggerated flapping arms, they'll strike fear into the hearts of any seagull contemplating a fry heist.
The Seagull Street Performers: Turn the tables on the seagulls by putting them to work as street performers, entertaining beachgoers with their impressive acrobatic skills and synchronized flying routines. Who needs a seagull stealing your fries when you can watch them perform daring aerial stunts instead?
Here's what we would do if we ran a fry stand and our seagull employees stole customers food:
The Seagull Stockade: Construct a tiny bird-sized stockade on the beach and publicly shame the offending seagulls by locking them up for all to see. Bonus points for adding tiny "Wanted" posters with their mugshots plastered all over town.
The Seagull Sensitivity Training: Enroll the mischievous seagulls in a mandatory sensitivity training program to teach them the importance of respecting personal property and boundaries. It's time they learned that stealing fries is not a victimless crime!
The Seagull Hair Salon: Transform the pesky seagulls into fashion icons by giving them outrageous makeovers at the local bird salon. Picture seagulls strutting down the boardwalk with brightly colored feathers and stylish accessories, too fabulous to bother with stealing fries.
The Seagull Scarecrow Squad: Recruit a team of scarecrows dressed in beach attire to patrol the coastline and keep the seagulls in check. With their menacing stares and exaggerated flapping arms, they'll strike fear into the hearts of any seagull contemplating a fry heist.
The Seagull Street Performers: Turn the tables on the seagulls by putting them to work as street performers, entertaining beachgoers with their impressive acrobatic skills and synchronized flying routines. Who needs a seagull stealing your fries when you can watch them perform daring aerial stunts instead?
2 years ago
50 purse cent
Another negotiator
Maybe she never learned to spell because of one of these, here are five humorous and ridiculous reasons why you might not have learned to spell in grade school:
The Sneaky Spelling Bee Sabotage: Every time you studied for a spelling bee, your pet parrot would swoop in and mimic the wrong words, leaving you with a vocabulary full of squawks and chirps instead of proper spelling.
The Mischievous Magic Spellbook: Your attempts to study spelling were constantly thwarted by a mischievous magic spellbook that would swap out the correct spellings for ridiculous alternatives like "eleventeen" and "kangaroom."
The Dastardly Dictionary Demons: Every time you opened a dictionary to look up a word, dictionary demons would pop out and rearrange the letters, turning your innocent search for knowledge into a chaotic game of word scramble.
The Pernicious Pencil Predicament: Your pencils were secretly in cahoots with the erasers, conspiring to erase your spelling homework every time you turned your back. It was like your own personal spelling Bermuda Triangle!
The Treacherous Typewriter Tyranny: Every time you tried to practice spelling on a typewriter, the keys would rebel and type out nonsensical gibberish like "qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm" instead of actual words. It was like a typewriter version of autocorrect gone haywire!
Maybe she never learned to spell because of one of these, here are five humorous and ridiculous reasons why you might not have learned to spell in grade school:
The Sneaky Spelling Bee Sabotage: Every time you studied for a spelling bee, your pet parrot would swoop in and mimic the wrong words, leaving you with a vocabulary full of squawks and chirps instead of proper spelling.
The Mischievous Magic Spellbook: Your attempts to study spelling were constantly thwarted by a mischievous magic spellbook that would swap out the correct spellings for ridiculous alternatives like "eleventeen" and "kangaroom."
The Dastardly Dictionary Demons: Every time you opened a dictionary to look up a word, dictionary demons would pop out and rearrange the letters, turning your innocent search for knowledge into a chaotic game of word scramble.
The Pernicious Pencil Predicament: Your pencils were secretly in cahoots with the erasers, conspiring to erase your spelling homework every time you turned your back. It was like your own personal spelling Bermuda Triangle!
The Treacherous Typewriter Tyranny: Every time you tried to practice spelling on a typewriter, the keys would rebel and type out nonsensical gibberish like "qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm" instead of actual words. It was like a typewriter version of autocorrect gone haywire!
