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11 months ago
We are not the same
Though you are better in these circumstances by only shitting one article of clothing. Only visionaries shit their shirt though and here's 5 reasons why they're superior:
The Fashion Fiasco: "Because shitting your shirt is the ultimate fashion statement—forget about designer labels and runway trends, nothing says 'style icon' like a fresh coat of brown. Who needs Gucci when you've got dookie chic?"
The Stain Swagger: "Because shitting your shirt is a power move that asserts dominance over lesser beings. Anyone can spill coffee on their blouse, but it takes a true innovator to turn their clothing into a canvas for artistic expression. Picasso would be proud!"
The Stench Status: "Because shitting your shirt is the olfactory equivalent of spraying yourself with expensive cologne—sure, it might not smell like roses, but it's guaranteed to turn heads and clear out a room faster than any designer fragrance."
The Confidence Crapshoot: "Because shitting your shirt is a bold declaration of self-confidence—it says, 'I am unapologetically me, stains and all.' Who needs to impress others when you're already secure in your status as the reigning king or queen of bodily functions?"
The Excrement Excellence: "Because shitting your shirt is a surefire way to stand out from the crowd—literally. In a sea of mundane mediocrity, you'll be the shining star, the beacon of fecal fortitude, the undeniable symbol of superiority. Bow down to the shirt-shitting champion!"
The Fashion Fiasco: "Because shitting your shirt is the ultimate fashion statement—forget about designer labels and runway trends, nothing says 'style icon' like a fresh coat of brown. Who needs Gucci when you've got dookie chic?"
The Stain Swagger: "Because shitting your shirt is a power move that asserts dominance over lesser beings. Anyone can spill coffee on their blouse, but it takes a true innovator to turn their clothing into a canvas for artistic expression. Picasso would be proud!"
The Stench Status: "Because shitting your shirt is the olfactory equivalent of spraying yourself with expensive cologne—sure, it might not smell like roses, but it's guaranteed to turn heads and clear out a room faster than any designer fragrance."
The Confidence Crapshoot: "Because shitting your shirt is a bold declaration of self-confidence—it says, 'I am unapologetically me, stains and all.' Who needs to impress others when you're already secure in your status as the reigning king or queen of bodily functions?"
The Excrement Excellence: "Because shitting your shirt is a surefire way to stand out from the crowd—literally. In a sea of mundane mediocrity, you'll be the shining star, the beacon of fecal fortitude, the undeniable symbol of superiority. Bow down to the shirt-shitting champion!"
11 months ago
Car guy behaviour
Thanks man really cool please drive me to my destination now, we don't care about your car here are 5 reasons why:
"The Yawn-Inducing Yaris Effect: Sure, your car may be your pride and joy, but to everyone else, it's just another mundane mode of transportation. No matter how many times you wax poetic about its impressive fuel efficiency or spacious cup holders, the response is always the same: a collective yawn and a polite nod of indifference.
"The Ego-Eclipsing SUV Syndrome: Your car may be big and bold, but so is everyone else's ego. No matter how many times you rev your engine or flaunt your oversized wheels, you're just another speck in a sea of oversized vehicles. Sorry to burst your bubble, but there's no room for bragging rights in the carpool lane.
"The Luxury Lemon Letdown: Ah, the sweet smell of leather upholstery and the satisfying click of a closing door—too bad it's all just a facade. Despite your best efforts to impress with your luxury vehicle, everyone sees through the charade and recognizes your car for what it truly is: a glorified lemon with a hefty price tag.
"The Attention-Deficit Accord Affliction: No matter how flashy your car may be, it's no match for the short attention spans of today's society. One moment you're the talk of the town with your sleek new ride, and the next, you're yesterday's news as everyone moves on to the next big thing. Sorry, but your fifteen minutes of automotive fame are up.
"The Envy-Inducing Ego Eraser: Congratulations, you've succeeded in making everyone else feel slightly better about their own subpar vehicles. Your incessant bragging about horsepower and torque has only served to highlight the glaring inadequacies of your personality, leaving everyone else feeling grateful for their humble rides and unassuming egos. Thanks for the reality check, champ.
"The Yawn-Inducing Yaris Effect: Sure, your car may be your pride and joy, but to everyone else, it's just another mundane mode of transportation. No matter how many times you wax poetic about its impressive fuel efficiency or spacious cup holders, the response is always the same: a collective yawn and a polite nod of indifference.
"The Ego-Eclipsing SUV Syndrome: Your car may be big and bold, but so is everyone else's ego. No matter how many times you rev your engine or flaunt your oversized wheels, you're just another speck in a sea of oversized vehicles. Sorry to burst your bubble, but there's no room for bragging rights in the carpool lane.
"The Luxury Lemon Letdown: Ah, the sweet smell of leather upholstery and the satisfying click of a closing door—too bad it's all just a facade. Despite your best efforts to impress with your luxury vehicle, everyone sees through the charade and recognizes your car for what it truly is: a glorified lemon with a hefty price tag.
"The Attention-Deficit Accord Affliction: No matter how flashy your car may be, it's no match for the short attention spans of today's society. One moment you're the talk of the town with your sleek new ride, and the next, you're yesterday's news as everyone moves on to the next big thing. Sorry, but your fifteen minutes of automotive fame are up.
"The Envy-Inducing Ego Eraser: Congratulations, you've succeeded in making everyone else feel slightly better about their own subpar vehicles. Your incessant bragging about horsepower and torque has only served to highlight the glaring inadequacies of your personality, leaving everyone else feeling grateful for their humble rides and unassuming egos. Thanks for the reality check, champ.
8 months ago
8 months ago
8 months ago
11 months ago
Hide it behind something green
You buy the ice cream you deserve the lions share plus kids are smaller then you
We do have some reasons why they should find a job as early as 6 years old like in the olden days though
"Tiny Hands, Big Work Ethic":
"Who needs adult workers when you have tiny, nimble-fingered children ready to tackle the toughest tasks? Plus, think of the money saved on office supplies – those little hands are perfect for stapling!"
"CEO: Chief Executive Offspring":
"Why wait until adulthood to climb the corporate ladder? With child labor laws abolished, we can start grooming the next generation of CEOs straight out of the sandbox. Just imagine the boardroom meetings with juice boxes and crayons!"
"Nap Time is for Quitters":
"Forget mandated breaks – with child labor laws out of the picture, we can keep our workforce going 24/7! Who needs sleep when you have endless energy and an unlimited supply of candy?"
"School's Out Forever":
"Why waste time in classrooms when there's real-world experience to be gained? Abolishing child labor laws means children can skip school and jump straight into the workforce. After all, who needs math when you have manual labor?"
"Playtime is Overrated":
"With child labor laws abolished, we can put an end to frivolous activities like playing and socializing. It's time to instill a strong work ethic from a young age – because nothing builds character like a 12-hour shift in a coal mine!"
We do have some reasons why they should find a job as early as 6 years old like in the olden days though
"Tiny Hands, Big Work Ethic":
"Who needs adult workers when you have tiny, nimble-fingered children ready to tackle the toughest tasks? Plus, think of the money saved on office supplies – those little hands are perfect for stapling!"
"CEO: Chief Executive Offspring":
"Why wait until adulthood to climb the corporate ladder? With child labor laws abolished, we can start grooming the next generation of CEOs straight out of the sandbox. Just imagine the boardroom meetings with juice boxes and crayons!"
"Nap Time is for Quitters":
"Forget mandated breaks – with child labor laws out of the picture, we can keep our workforce going 24/7! Who needs sleep when you have endless energy and an unlimited supply of candy?"
"School's Out Forever":
"Why waste time in classrooms when there's real-world experience to be gained? Abolishing child labor laws means children can skip school and jump straight into the workforce. After all, who needs math when you have manual labor?"
"Playtime is Overrated":
"With child labor laws abolished, we can put an end to frivolous activities like playing and socializing. It's time to instill a strong work ethic from a young age – because nothing builds character like a 12-hour shift in a coal mine!"
8 months ago
