Register for a no ad experience.
10 months ago
Getting a promotion
Also less competition. A rich private school is a gold mine for a drug dealer and here's some reasons why:
The Exclusive Market: "Because a rich private school is like the VIP section of the drug dealing world—where else can you find a clientele with trust funds and a taste for designer drugs? It's like selling caviar to fish."
The Academic Pressure: "Because a rich private school is a pressure cooker of stress and anxiety—what better way to cope with the existential dread of final exams than with a little something to take the edge off? Who needs Adderall when you've got Ambien?"
The Extracurricular Escapades: "Because a rich private school is a breeding ground for rebellion—when your parents have already bought your future, why not indulge in a little recreational rebellion? Cocaine and calculus go together like PB&J, right?"
The Parental Disconnect: "Because a rich private school is like a fortress of privilege, where helicopter parents hover at a safe distance—what better place to fly under the radar and peddle your wares? Just make sure to avoid the PTA meetings."
The Rich Kids' Revolt: "Because a rich private school is a powder keg of entitlement and boredom—what better way to stick it to the man than by turning the student lounge into your own personal pharmacy? It's like Robin Hood, but with Xanax instead of bows and arrows."
The Exclusive Market: "Because a rich private school is like the VIP section of the drug dealing world—where else can you find a clientele with trust funds and a taste for designer drugs? It's like selling caviar to fish."
The Academic Pressure: "Because a rich private school is a pressure cooker of stress and anxiety—what better way to cope with the existential dread of final exams than with a little something to take the edge off? Who needs Adderall when you've got Ambien?"
The Extracurricular Escapades: "Because a rich private school is a breeding ground for rebellion—when your parents have already bought your future, why not indulge in a little recreational rebellion? Cocaine and calculus go together like PB&J, right?"
The Parental Disconnect: "Because a rich private school is like a fortress of privilege, where helicopter parents hover at a safe distance—what better place to fly under the radar and peddle your wares? Just make sure to avoid the PTA meetings."
The Rich Kids' Revolt: "Because a rich private school is a powder keg of entitlement and boredom—what better way to stick it to the man than by turning the student lounge into your own personal pharmacy? It's like Robin Hood, but with Xanax instead of bows and arrows."
7 months ago
10 months ago
A strategic misstep
She probably suspects way worse now. I asked our intern Kyle to write 5 possible stories but since he's spent like 7 years in the bighouse they all came out jail related.
Yes we hire ex-cons take that ESG scores!
"The Mastermind Mishap": You were once known as the infamous "Socks Bandit" for stealing pairs of socks from every laundromat in town. Your girlfriend might think twice about leaving her favorite socks unattended now!
"The Great Escape Episode": You were briefly incarcerated for attempting to break out of an amusement park haunted house because you were convinced it was a real prison. Your girlfriend might worry about your problem-solving skills (or lack thereof) in sticky situations.
"The Celebrity Cellmate Caper": You once claimed to have been cellmates with a famous celebrity during your brief stint in jail, only to later admit it was just a cardboard cutout of them in the visitor's room. Your girlfriend might question your grasp on reality (and your taste in friends).
"The Tattoo Taboo": You got a tattoo in jail of your favorite cartoon character, only to realize too late that it was misspelled. Your girlfriend might wonder if you're still struggling with basic literacy (or just have a questionable taste in body art).
"The Prison Performance Ploy": You were briefly known as the "Singing Serenader" for your attempts to start a jailhouse boy band. Your girlfriend might be concerned about your career aspirations (and your singing voice).
Yes we hire ex-cons take that ESG scores!
"The Mastermind Mishap": You were once known as the infamous "Socks Bandit" for stealing pairs of socks from every laundromat in town. Your girlfriend might think twice about leaving her favorite socks unattended now!
"The Great Escape Episode": You were briefly incarcerated for attempting to break out of an amusement park haunted house because you were convinced it was a real prison. Your girlfriend might worry about your problem-solving skills (or lack thereof) in sticky situations.
"The Celebrity Cellmate Caper": You once claimed to have been cellmates with a famous celebrity during your brief stint in jail, only to later admit it was just a cardboard cutout of them in the visitor's room. Your girlfriend might question your grasp on reality (and your taste in friends).
"The Tattoo Taboo": You got a tattoo in jail of your favorite cartoon character, only to realize too late that it was misspelled. Your girlfriend might wonder if you're still struggling with basic literacy (or just have a questionable taste in body art).
"The Prison Performance Ploy": You were briefly known as the "Singing Serenader" for your attempts to start a jailhouse boy band. Your girlfriend might be concerned about your career aspirations (and your singing voice).
7 months ago
7 months ago
7 months ago
7 months ago
