Register for a no ad experience.
1 year ago
Illiterate Bae!
Can't see red flags if you can't spell them. You should always love your illiterate girlfriend and here's a few reasons why:
The Love Letter Lark: "Because who needs Shakespeare when your illiterate girlfriend writes you love letters that are more entertaining than a Netflix rom-com? Spelling mistakes are just her way of adding suspense!"
The Bookworm Bliss: "Because with an illiterate girlfriend, you'll never have to worry about sharing your favorite books. Just think of all the quality time you'll save by not having to debate the merits of Hemingway's prose!"
The Texting Tease: "Because deciphering her texts is like solving a cryptic crossword puzzle—you never know what you're going to get, but it's always an adventure. Who needs grammar when you've got emojis?"
The Literary Love: "Because while she may not be able to read, she's a master at creating her own stories. From tall tales to elaborate excuses, her imagination knows no bounds!"
The Poetry Paradox: "Because with an illiterate girlfriend, you'll never have to worry about her stealing your copy of 'Fifty Shades of Grey.' Instead, you'll get to experience the thrill of reading her own steamy poetry—complete with creative spelling and alliteration!"
The Love Letter Lark: "Because who needs Shakespeare when your illiterate girlfriend writes you love letters that are more entertaining than a Netflix rom-com? Spelling mistakes are just her way of adding suspense!"
The Bookworm Bliss: "Because with an illiterate girlfriend, you'll never have to worry about sharing your favorite books. Just think of all the quality time you'll save by not having to debate the merits of Hemingway's prose!"
The Texting Tease: "Because deciphering her texts is like solving a cryptic crossword puzzle—you never know what you're going to get, but it's always an adventure. Who needs grammar when you've got emojis?"
The Literary Love: "Because while she may not be able to read, she's a master at creating her own stories. From tall tales to elaborate excuses, her imagination knows no bounds!"
The Poetry Paradox: "Because with an illiterate girlfriend, you'll never have to worry about her stealing your copy of 'Fifty Shades of Grey.' Instead, you'll get to experience the thrill of reading her own steamy poetry—complete with creative spelling and alliteration!"
1 year ago
Crazy frog NFT's
Fully unethically coerced and forced! This is it, this is the NFT that changed my mind about NFT's . Here are some reasons why the only NFT worth buying is the Crazy Frog NFT :
"The Amphibious Anthem:" Who needs a boring old NFT when you can own a piece of digital history with a Crazy Frog-themed NFT? It's not just a sound, it's an amphibious anthem that will echo through the digital halls of eternity—complete with the sound of that iconic "ring ding ding ding ding" that's sure to drive your neighbors crazy.
"The Meme Magic Manifesto:" Crazy Frog is more than just a digital character—he's a meme magic manifesto waiting to happen. With his signature dance moves and catchy tunes, he's the perfect muse for creating viral content that's sure to leave your followers in stitches.
"The Crypto Croaker Collectible:" Move over, Bitcoin—there's a new crypto croaker in town. With a Crazy Frog-themed NFT in your digital wallet, you'll be riding the wave of the future with a one-of-a-kind collectible that's sure to make you the envy of all your crypto-loving friends.
"The Digital Dance Party:" Why settle for a boring old static image when you can own a Crazy Frog-themed NFT that comes to life with every ring ding ding ding ding? With his infectious energy and unstoppable enthusiasm, Crazy Frog will turn your digital art collection into a non-stop dance party that's sure to get everyone grooving.
"The Frogtastic Financial Future:" They say investing in NFTs is risky business, but with a Crazy Frog-themed NFT in your portfolio, you'll be hopping straight to the bank. With his undeniable charm and timeless appeal, Crazy Frog is sure to hold his value—and then some—in the ever-evolving world of digital assets.
"The Amphibious Anthem:" Who needs a boring old NFT when you can own a piece of digital history with a Crazy Frog-themed NFT? It's not just a sound, it's an amphibious anthem that will echo through the digital halls of eternity—complete with the sound of that iconic "ring ding ding ding ding" that's sure to drive your neighbors crazy.
"The Meme Magic Manifesto:" Crazy Frog is more than just a digital character—he's a meme magic manifesto waiting to happen. With his signature dance moves and catchy tunes, he's the perfect muse for creating viral content that's sure to leave your followers in stitches.
"The Crypto Croaker Collectible:" Move over, Bitcoin—there's a new crypto croaker in town. With a Crazy Frog-themed NFT in your digital wallet, you'll be riding the wave of the future with a one-of-a-kind collectible that's sure to make you the envy of all your crypto-loving friends.
"The Digital Dance Party:" Why settle for a boring old static image when you can own a Crazy Frog-themed NFT that comes to life with every ring ding ding ding ding? With his infectious energy and unstoppable enthusiasm, Crazy Frog will turn your digital art collection into a non-stop dance party that's sure to get everyone grooving.
"The Frogtastic Financial Future:" They say investing in NFTs is risky business, but with a Crazy Frog-themed NFT in your portfolio, you'll be hopping straight to the bank. With his undeniable charm and timeless appeal, Crazy Frog is sure to hold his value—and then some—in the ever-evolving world of digital assets.
1 year ago
Revenge never tasted so sweet
He called in a strike.
Why stop there? Here's how he can continue using authority to his advantage:
"The Parking Ticket Parade": Have your brother swing by your enemy's neighborhood and start doling out parking tickets like candy on Halloween. Bonus points if he targets their driveway for a ticket-worthy violation, like parking slightly over the line or facing the wrong direction.
"Siren Symphony": Arrange for your brother to park his patrol car near your enemy's house and periodically turn on the sirens for a few seconds at a time. It's like a symphony of annoyance, with a touch of law enforcement flair.
"License and Registration, Please": Stage a routine traffic stop near your enemy's workplace or favorite hangout spot, complete with flashing lights and a friendly reminder to always obey traffic laws. Just be sure to let them off with a warning—after all, it's all in good fun.
"Community Policing": Encourage your brother to organize a neighborhood watch program and enlist your enemy as a volunteer. Nothing says "community service" like spending your weekends patrolling the streets for suspicious activity, right?
"The Case of the Missing Cat": Convince your brother to launch a full-scale investigation into the mysterious disappearance of your enemy's beloved pet rock, garden gnome, or other inanimate object of sentimental value. Who knows, maybe they'll even crack the case wide open (or not).
Why stop there? Here's how he can continue using authority to his advantage:
"The Parking Ticket Parade": Have your brother swing by your enemy's neighborhood and start doling out parking tickets like candy on Halloween. Bonus points if he targets their driveway for a ticket-worthy violation, like parking slightly over the line or facing the wrong direction.
"Siren Symphony": Arrange for your brother to park his patrol car near your enemy's house and periodically turn on the sirens for a few seconds at a time. It's like a symphony of annoyance, with a touch of law enforcement flair.
"License and Registration, Please": Stage a routine traffic stop near your enemy's workplace or favorite hangout spot, complete with flashing lights and a friendly reminder to always obey traffic laws. Just be sure to let them off with a warning—after all, it's all in good fun.
"Community Policing": Encourage your brother to organize a neighborhood watch program and enlist your enemy as a volunteer. Nothing says "community service" like spending your weekends patrolling the streets for suspicious activity, right?
"The Case of the Missing Cat": Convince your brother to launch a full-scale investigation into the mysterious disappearance of your enemy's beloved pet rock, garden gnome, or other inanimate object of sentimental value. Who knows, maybe they'll even crack the case wide open (or not).
1 year ago
12 months ago
1 year ago
A very uncooperative towel
Some parts are soft but once wet you get the finger daggers
Here are some reasons you should avid drying yourselves with a CAT
"Fur-tastic Fluffiness":
"Using a cat as a towel means trading wetness for fur-tastic fluffiness, leaving you covered in more hair than a shedding season."
"Paw-sitively Purr-fect Prints":
"Drying off with a cat's paws might sound cute, but you'll end up with paw prints everywhere, along with a mosaic of muddy marks and scratches!"
"Catastrophic Cleanup Crew":
"Expect a catastrophic cleanup crew if you use a cat as a towel – their grooming habits might leave you cleaner, but you'll deal with hairballs galore."
"Meow-t of Resistance":
"Drying off with a cat guarantees a meow-t of resistance, with clawed protests and a soggy feline frenzy."
"Tail of Tangled Troubles":
"Using a cat as a towel leads to a tail of tangled troubles, leaving you wrapped in a furry fiasco and your cat with a grudge."
Here are some reasons you should avid drying yourselves with a CAT
"Fur-tastic Fluffiness":
"Using a cat as a towel means trading wetness for fur-tastic fluffiness, leaving you covered in more hair than a shedding season."
"Paw-sitively Purr-fect Prints":
"Drying off with a cat's paws might sound cute, but you'll end up with paw prints everywhere, along with a mosaic of muddy marks and scratches!"
"Catastrophic Cleanup Crew":
"Expect a catastrophic cleanup crew if you use a cat as a towel – their grooming habits might leave you cleaner, but you'll deal with hairballs galore."
"Meow-t of Resistance":
"Drying off with a cat guarantees a meow-t of resistance, with clawed protests and a soggy feline frenzy."
"Tail of Tangled Troubles":
"Using a cat as a towel leads to a tail of tangled troubles, leaving you wrapped in a furry fiasco and your cat with a grudge."
1 year ago
Fail with huge consequences
This hurt to read. A few reasons why not to fuck your family members as if Chris-Chan would read this page at one point and this info is needed.
"The Family Feud Fallout: Who needs Thanksgiving drama when you can have a lifetime of awkward family gatherings? Congratulations, you've just won the prestigious title of 'Most Likely to Ruin Family Reunions'—hope you enjoy explaining why you can never look Uncle Bob in the eye again.
"The Gene Pool Party Pooper: Ever dreamt of turning family gatherings into a game of genetic Russian roulette? Say hello to your worst nightmare: a lifetime of worrying whether your offspring will inherit Aunt Mildred's beady eyes or Uncle Frank's unibrow. Who knew that family tree could have so many twisted branches?
"The Incestuous Inquisition: Prepare for a lifetime of awkward questions and judgmental stares as you navigate the treacherous waters of sibling love. From uncomfortable interrogations by nosy neighbors to whispered gossip at family gatherings, you'll never escape the prying eyes of the incestuous inquisition.
"The Parental Pandemonium: Brace yourself for the ultimate showdown: facing your parents after they discover your taboo tryst. Get ready for a symphony of disappointed sighs, horrified gasps, and dramatic declarations of eternal damnation. Who knew that breaking the 'no sex with siblings' rule could have such dire consequences?
"The Freudian Fiasco: Congratulations, you've just earned yourself a lifetime subscription to Freudian therapy. Get ready to unpack years of unresolved childhood trauma, repressed memories, and Oedipal fantasies—all while trying to avoid making eye contact with your therapist. Remember: denial is just a river in Egypt.
"The Family Feud Fallout: Who needs Thanksgiving drama when you can have a lifetime of awkward family gatherings? Congratulations, you've just won the prestigious title of 'Most Likely to Ruin Family Reunions'—hope you enjoy explaining why you can never look Uncle Bob in the eye again.
"The Gene Pool Party Pooper: Ever dreamt of turning family gatherings into a game of genetic Russian roulette? Say hello to your worst nightmare: a lifetime of worrying whether your offspring will inherit Aunt Mildred's beady eyes or Uncle Frank's unibrow. Who knew that family tree could have so many twisted branches?
"The Incestuous Inquisition: Prepare for a lifetime of awkward questions and judgmental stares as you navigate the treacherous waters of sibling love. From uncomfortable interrogations by nosy neighbors to whispered gossip at family gatherings, you'll never escape the prying eyes of the incestuous inquisition.
"The Parental Pandemonium: Brace yourself for the ultimate showdown: facing your parents after they discover your taboo tryst. Get ready for a symphony of disappointed sighs, horrified gasps, and dramatic declarations of eternal damnation. Who knew that breaking the 'no sex with siblings' rule could have such dire consequences?
"The Freudian Fiasco: Congratulations, you've just earned yourself a lifetime subscription to Freudian therapy. Get ready to unpack years of unresolved childhood trauma, repressed memories, and Oedipal fantasies—all while trying to avoid making eye contact with your therapist. Remember: denial is just a river in Egypt.
