Register for a no ad experience.
1 year ago
We're on it shitlips
This was one of the best tropes used in 90s animations and i use to love it
We've invented a few of our own for everybody's amusement
"Listen up, Captain Cockup, my apologies for any disrespect. Your brilliance surely conceals a plan beyond my meager understanding."
"Baron Blunderbrain, forgive my impudence. Your schemes are undoubtedly superior, and I am but a lowly minion awaiting your divine instruction."
"Major Moron, please excuse my audacity. Your strategic prowess is unmatched, and I am but a humble servant at your disposal."
"Dr. Dunderhead, I mean no offense. Your malevolent laughter surely heralds a stroke of genius, and I am privileged to serve under your command."
"General Goon, forgive my insolence. Your leadership reigns supreme, and I am but a devoted lackey awaiting your every beck and call."
We've invented a few of our own for everybody's amusement
"Listen up, Captain Cockup, my apologies for any disrespect. Your brilliance surely conceals a plan beyond my meager understanding."
"Baron Blunderbrain, forgive my impudence. Your schemes are undoubtedly superior, and I am but a lowly minion awaiting your divine instruction."
"Major Moron, please excuse my audacity. Your strategic prowess is unmatched, and I am but a humble servant at your disposal."
"Dr. Dunderhead, I mean no offense. Your malevolent laughter surely heralds a stroke of genius, and I am privileged to serve under your command."
"General Goon, forgive my insolence. Your leadership reigns supreme, and I am but a devoted lackey awaiting your every beck and call."
1 year ago
Spelling is important
Illiteracy is dangerous, but funny. I say spelling things wrong is funny and we should do it more, burn the books close all schools. Here's 5 reasons why spelling things wrong makes me laugh and ergo is a good thing:
"The Phonetic Phantasm": "Spelling things wrong adds an element of mystery and intrigue to everyday conversations. Who needs correct spelling when you can create your own phonetic language? It's like a secret code that only you and your fellow misspellers can understand."
"The Autocorrect Adventure": "Thanks to autocorrect, spelling things wrong has become a hilarious game of 'Guess What I Meant.' It's like playing Mad Libs with your phone, except the results are even more nonsensical—and somehow, more entertaining."
"The Typo Tango": "Spelling things wrong is the ultimate icebreaker in awkward social situations. Instead of stumbling over your words, just throw in a strategically placed typo and watch as everyone laughs along with you. Who knew misspellings could be so charming?"
"The Creative Chaos": "Spelling things wrong unleashes your inner artist, allowing you to create masterpieces of linguistic absurdity. Why stick to the rules when you can invent your own spellings and redefine the English language one typo at a time?"
"The Homophone Hilarity": "Spelling things wrong opens up a world of pun-tastic possibilities, where every typo becomes a potential punchline. Who cares about proper grammar when you can turn 'their' into 'they're' and 'you're' into 'your' for maximum comedic effect?"
"The Phonetic Phantasm": "Spelling things wrong adds an element of mystery and intrigue to everyday conversations. Who needs correct spelling when you can create your own phonetic language? It's like a secret code that only you and your fellow misspellers can understand."
"The Autocorrect Adventure": "Thanks to autocorrect, spelling things wrong has become a hilarious game of 'Guess What I Meant.' It's like playing Mad Libs with your phone, except the results are even more nonsensical—and somehow, more entertaining."
"The Typo Tango": "Spelling things wrong is the ultimate icebreaker in awkward social situations. Instead of stumbling over your words, just throw in a strategically placed typo and watch as everyone laughs along with you. Who knew misspellings could be so charming?"
"The Creative Chaos": "Spelling things wrong unleashes your inner artist, allowing you to create masterpieces of linguistic absurdity. Why stick to the rules when you can invent your own spellings and redefine the English language one typo at a time?"
"The Homophone Hilarity": "Spelling things wrong opens up a world of pun-tastic possibilities, where every typo becomes a potential punchline. Who cares about proper grammar when you can turn 'their' into 'they're' and 'you're' into 'your' for maximum comedic effect?"
1 year ago
Run girl or get a gun or both
He seems like he'd make a skin-suit out of her. I guess I'm not allowed to technically say you should shoot him outright *wink wink* so here are some Home Alone style ways you can protect yourself from a dangerous stalker!
DIY Booby Traps: Channel your inner MacGyver and rig up some hilarious yet effective booby traps using household items. Think strategically placed marbles, buckets of slime over doorways, and strategically positioned rubber chickens. Who knew self-defense could be so slapstick?
Fake-Out Escape Plans: Set up fake escape routes that lead nowhere, like a hallway of cardboard cutouts or a secret door that opens to reveal a closet full of old Halloween costumes. Your stalker will be left scratching their head while you make a real getaway.
Inflatable Doppelgangers: Invest in a few life-sized inflatable replicas of yourself to scatter around the house. Your stalker won't know which one is the real you, giving you plenty of time to slip away unnoticed while they're busy interrogating your vinyl doppelgangers.
Kitchen Chaos: Turn your kitchen into a culinary battleground by strategically placing pots, pans, and utensils within arm's reach. When your stalker least expects it, unleash a barrage of flying cookware to send them running for cover—or at least ducking for cover.
Animal Allies: Enlist the help of your furry (or feathery) friends to thwart your stalker's advances. Train your pet parrot to squawk obscenities whenever they approach or teach your cat to trip them up with well-timed leg weaves. After all, who needs a guard dog when you have a guard chicken?
DIY Booby Traps: Channel your inner MacGyver and rig up some hilarious yet effective booby traps using household items. Think strategically placed marbles, buckets of slime over doorways, and strategically positioned rubber chickens. Who knew self-defense could be so slapstick?
Fake-Out Escape Plans: Set up fake escape routes that lead nowhere, like a hallway of cardboard cutouts or a secret door that opens to reveal a closet full of old Halloween costumes. Your stalker will be left scratching their head while you make a real getaway.
Inflatable Doppelgangers: Invest in a few life-sized inflatable replicas of yourself to scatter around the house. Your stalker won't know which one is the real you, giving you plenty of time to slip away unnoticed while they're busy interrogating your vinyl doppelgangers.
Kitchen Chaos: Turn your kitchen into a culinary battleground by strategically placing pots, pans, and utensils within arm's reach. When your stalker least expects it, unleash a barrage of flying cookware to send them running for cover—or at least ducking for cover.
Animal Allies: Enlist the help of your furry (or feathery) friends to thwart your stalker's advances. Train your pet parrot to squawk obscenities whenever they approach or teach your cat to trip them up with well-timed leg weaves. After all, who needs a guard dog when you have a guard chicken?
1 year ago
Chris Chan Moment
Awkward and unwholesome...that ass though and I can say it we're not related. Complimenting your mothers ass is just awkward so have some reasons (ifyou even need any) not to do it:
"The Oedipal Odyssey": Complimenting your mother's awesome ass is like stepping into a Freudian nightmare. It's not just awkward; it's a one-way ticket to years of therapy and unresolved mommy issues. Best to keep those compliments strictly above the waist.
"The Maternal Mix-Up": Complimenting your mother's awesome ass is like accidentally texting your ex "I miss you" instead of your new crush. It's a cringe-worthy mistake that'll haunt you for years to come—and probably end up in a family therapy session or two.
"The Freudian Slip-Up": Complimenting your mother's awesome ass is like playing Russian roulette with your relationship. One wrong move and you'll find yourself in a conversation so uncomfortable, even the family dog will start to squirm. It's best to keep the compliments platonic and the boundaries intact.
"The Freudian Foot-in-Mouth": Complimenting your mother's awesome ass is like putting your foot in your mouth—except instead of foot odor, it's the stench of awkwardness that lingers in the air. It's a social faux pas of epic proportions, destined to become the stuff of family legend.
"The Oedipal Oopsie-Daisy": Complimenting your mother's awesome ass is like accidentally calling your teacher "mom" in front of the whole class. It's a cringe-worthy moment that'll live on in family lore for generations to come—and probably earn you a spot on the therapist's couch.
"The Oedipal Odyssey": Complimenting your mother's awesome ass is like stepping into a Freudian nightmare. It's not just awkward; it's a one-way ticket to years of therapy and unresolved mommy issues. Best to keep those compliments strictly above the waist.
"The Maternal Mix-Up": Complimenting your mother's awesome ass is like accidentally texting your ex "I miss you" instead of your new crush. It's a cringe-worthy mistake that'll haunt you for years to come—and probably end up in a family therapy session or two.
"The Freudian Slip-Up": Complimenting your mother's awesome ass is like playing Russian roulette with your relationship. One wrong move and you'll find yourself in a conversation so uncomfortable, even the family dog will start to squirm. It's best to keep the compliments platonic and the boundaries intact.
"The Freudian Foot-in-Mouth": Complimenting your mother's awesome ass is like putting your foot in your mouth—except instead of foot odor, it's the stench of awkwardness that lingers in the air. It's a social faux pas of epic proportions, destined to become the stuff of family legend.
"The Oedipal Oopsie-Daisy": Complimenting your mother's awesome ass is like accidentally calling your teacher "mom" in front of the whole class. It's a cringe-worthy moment that'll live on in family lore for generations to come—and probably earn you a spot on the therapist's couch.
1 year ago
1 year ago
1 year ago
