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2 years ago
A vey carefull man!
Watching his step biding his time ready for anything!
Have 5 reasons why this is a good idea
Stealth Mode: Because checking the time discreetly is a skill best mastered with your foot!
Leg Day Countdown: Who needs a gym timer when your ankle watch can remind you how long it's been since your last leg workout?
Fancy Footwork: Because nothing says "classy" like accessorizing your ankles!
Time Flies When You're Having Fun... at the Beach: For those who want to keep track of time while frolicking in the waves without the risk of losing their watch to the ocean.
Ankle Fashion Trendsetter: Who needs wristwatch tan lines when you can start a new trend of ankle watch tan lines?
Have 5 reasons why this is a good idea
Stealth Mode: Because checking the time discreetly is a skill best mastered with your foot!
Leg Day Countdown: Who needs a gym timer when your ankle watch can remind you how long it's been since your last leg workout?
Fancy Footwork: Because nothing says "classy" like accessorizing your ankles!
Time Flies When You're Having Fun... at the Beach: For those who want to keep track of time while frolicking in the waves without the risk of losing their watch to the ocean.
Ankle Fashion Trendsetter: Who needs wristwatch tan lines when you can start a new trend of ankle watch tan lines?
2 years ago
2 years ago
Canada will activly help you die
Without charging you a fortune though. Though we should talk about the elephant in the room. Being dead means all your health problems are solved! Here's 5 funny reasons why being dead means you are technically healthy:
"The Eternal Rest Plan": "Who needs expensive medical treatments when you can achieve eternal peace with just one injection? Euthanasia is the ultimate 'set it and forget it' healthcare plan—no more copays, no more waiting rooms, just sweet, sweet oblivion."
"The Ultimate Weight Loss Solution": "Say goodbye to dieting and exercise—euthanasia guarantees you'll never have to worry about fitting into those skinny jeans again. Who knew death could be the ultimate crash diet?"
"The Instant Doctor's Note": "With euthanasia, you'll never have to fake a sick day again. Just schedule your appointment with the Grim Reaper and enjoy unlimited time off from work—no questions asked."
"The Pain-Free Plan": "Why waste time and money on painkillers and physical therapy when you can skip straight to the final solution? Euthanasia ensures you'll never have to suffer through another headache or backache again—because you'll be too busy enjoying the afterlife."
"The Budget-Friendly Benefit": "Forget expensive medical bills and insurance premiums—euthanasia is the ultimate cost-saving measure. Just think of all the money you'll save on doctor's visits, prescriptions, and hospital stays. It's the frugal way to go out with a bang."
"The Eternal Rest Plan": "Who needs expensive medical treatments when you can achieve eternal peace with just one injection? Euthanasia is the ultimate 'set it and forget it' healthcare plan—no more copays, no more waiting rooms, just sweet, sweet oblivion."
"The Ultimate Weight Loss Solution": "Say goodbye to dieting and exercise—euthanasia guarantees you'll never have to worry about fitting into those skinny jeans again. Who knew death could be the ultimate crash diet?"
"The Instant Doctor's Note": "With euthanasia, you'll never have to fake a sick day again. Just schedule your appointment with the Grim Reaper and enjoy unlimited time off from work—no questions asked."
"The Pain-Free Plan": "Why waste time and money on painkillers and physical therapy when you can skip straight to the final solution? Euthanasia ensures you'll never have to suffer through another headache or backache again—because you'll be too busy enjoying the afterlife."
"The Budget-Friendly Benefit": "Forget expensive medical bills and insurance premiums—euthanasia is the ultimate cost-saving measure. Just think of all the money you'll save on doctor's visits, prescriptions, and hospital stays. It's the frugal way to go out with a bang."
2 years ago
HA doesn't help
BS doesn't either.
Ads are a part of the fun! That's why we have to compensate with a lot of memes for members (since you see none if you log in).
Here are some reasons a company might tell you disabling ads on the tv you bought own and paid for is never good:
"Because who needs uninterrupted viewing when you can play 'ad bingo' and guess which product will pop up next? It's like a surprise party for your remote control!"
"Why disable ads when you can turn your living room into a free-market battleground? It's like Black Friday every day, but without the bruises!"
"Forget peace and quiet! Embrace the chaos of commercial breaks! It's like a mini-vacation to 'Adland,' where the grass is always greener and the jingles never end!"
"Why disable ads when you can turn your TV into a pop culture time machine? It's like traveling back to the '80s, but with more product placement!"
"Who needs sanity when you can have a constant barrage of advertising? It's like having a personal salesperson in your living room, 24/7! Because nothing says 'relaxation' like being told what to buy every five minutes!"
Ads are a part of the fun! That's why we have to compensate with a lot of memes for members (since you see none if you log in).
Here are some reasons a company might tell you disabling ads on the tv you bought own and paid for is never good:
"Because who needs uninterrupted viewing when you can play 'ad bingo' and guess which product will pop up next? It's like a surprise party for your remote control!"
"Why disable ads when you can turn your living room into a free-market battleground? It's like Black Friday every day, but without the bruises!"
"Forget peace and quiet! Embrace the chaos of commercial breaks! It's like a mini-vacation to 'Adland,' where the grass is always greener and the jingles never end!"
"Why disable ads when you can turn your TV into a pop culture time machine? It's like traveling back to the '80s, but with more product placement!"
"Who needs sanity when you can have a constant barrage of advertising? It's like having a personal salesperson in your living room, 24/7! Because nothing says 'relaxation' like being told what to buy every five minutes!"
2 years ago
2 years ago
McDonalds ice cream machine
Not the hardest riddle.
These are just a few excuses we've heard as to why the darn things never work:
"Because the ice cream machine has developed stage fright—it's shy and prefers to perform only when there's no audience. We're working on its confidence."
"Because the ice cream machine is in cahoots with the napkin dispenser—it's their secret plan for world domination, one malfunction at a time."
"Because the ice cream machine is having an existential crisis—it's pondering the meaning of its soft-serve existence and needs some time off to find itself."
"Because the ice cream machine heard about global warming and decided to take a stand against melting—it's staging a protest by refusing to dispense anything cooler than room temperature."
"Because the ice cream machine is participating in a top-secret scientific experiment—it's being trained to communicate with extraterrestrial beings through Morse code encoded in sprinkles. Classified information, you know."
These are just a few excuses we've heard as to why the darn things never work:
"Because the ice cream machine has developed stage fright—it's shy and prefers to perform only when there's no audience. We're working on its confidence."
"Because the ice cream machine is in cahoots with the napkin dispenser—it's their secret plan for world domination, one malfunction at a time."
"Because the ice cream machine is having an existential crisis—it's pondering the meaning of its soft-serve existence and needs some time off to find itself."
"Because the ice cream machine heard about global warming and decided to take a stand against melting—it's staging a protest by refusing to dispense anything cooler than room temperature."
"Because the ice cream machine is participating in a top-secret scientific experiment—it's being trained to communicate with extraterrestrial beings through Morse code encoded in sprinkles. Classified information, you know."
2 years ago
Dream achieved
Might be the wrong type of cat though
He did you a favor according the the gnome that i paid in dogecoin to write this list
The "No Paw-blem" Predicament:
Heavy equipment doesn't worry about awkward grooming moments or scratching that elusive itch.
The "Machinery Meets Milk" Mismatch:
Heavy equipment enjoys gears over nine lives, without the risk of a dairy disaster ruining their day.
The "Tailless Triumph" Tale:
While cats chase tails, heavy equipment tackles piles of dirt – who needs whiskers when you have horsepower?
The "Load Box vs. Litter Box" Dilemma:
Heavy equipment skips litter box duty for conquering construction sites and moving mountains.
The "Curiosity Caution" Quip:
Heavy equipment knows better than to be curious – no one wants to be the bulldozer stuck in a tree!
He did you a favor according the the gnome that i paid in dogecoin to write this list
The "No Paw-blem" Predicament:
Heavy equipment doesn't worry about awkward grooming moments or scratching that elusive itch.
The "Machinery Meets Milk" Mismatch:
Heavy equipment enjoys gears over nine lives, without the risk of a dairy disaster ruining their day.
The "Tailless Triumph" Tale:
While cats chase tails, heavy equipment tackles piles of dirt – who needs whiskers when you have horsepower?
The "Load Box vs. Litter Box" Dilemma:
Heavy equipment skips litter box duty for conquering construction sites and moving mountains.
The "Curiosity Caution" Quip:
Heavy equipment knows better than to be curious – no one wants to be the bulldozer stuck in a tree!
