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9 months ago
Cute little bunny
Driving his tiny spider mech, maybe all bunnies should have a mech?
Let's get Raytheon on the horn and make them build something useful for once>
These reasons should convince your local senator to vote YES on the bunny MECH BILL
"To Combat the Carrot Shortage Crisis": With their insatiable appetite for carrots, bunnies are at risk of depleting our global carrot reserves. Equipping them with government-subsidized mechs not only helps them reach carrot fields faster but also ensures they have the firepower to protect their precious veggie stash from would-be thieves.
"Bunny Rush Hour Traffic Jams": Picture it: rows of adorable bunnies piloting miniature mechs during rush hour, hopping along at a snail's pace while munching on snacks and occasionally engaging in mech-sized road rage. It's like a scene straight out of a whimsical anime—complete with bunnies in bowties.
"Mechanical Hopping Competitions": Move over, Olympics—there's a new sporting event in town! With their newfound mechs, bunnies can participate in high-stakes hopping competitions, complete with obstacle courses and gravity-defying stunts. Who needs gold medals when you've got carrots at the finish line?
"Defense Against the Invasion of Giant Carrot Monsters": We all know the real threat to society: giant carrot monsters rising from the depths of the earth to wreak havoc on our vegetable patches. By arming bunnies with mechs, we're preparing them for the ultimate showdown against these orange behemoths. It's a battle of epic proportions—and only the bunnies can save us.
"To Establish a Bunny Mech Delivery Service": Tired of waiting for your packages to arrive? Fear not—bunny mechs are here to save the day! With their lightning-fast delivery service, you'll never have to wait more than a hop, skip, and a jump for your Amazon Prime orders again. Plus, who wouldn't want to receive a package from a bunny in a mech suit?
Let's get Raytheon on the horn and make them build something useful for once>
These reasons should convince your local senator to vote YES on the bunny MECH BILL
"To Combat the Carrot Shortage Crisis": With their insatiable appetite for carrots, bunnies are at risk of depleting our global carrot reserves. Equipping them with government-subsidized mechs not only helps them reach carrot fields faster but also ensures they have the firepower to protect their precious veggie stash from would-be thieves.
"Bunny Rush Hour Traffic Jams": Picture it: rows of adorable bunnies piloting miniature mechs during rush hour, hopping along at a snail's pace while munching on snacks and occasionally engaging in mech-sized road rage. It's like a scene straight out of a whimsical anime—complete with bunnies in bowties.
"Mechanical Hopping Competitions": Move over, Olympics—there's a new sporting event in town! With their newfound mechs, bunnies can participate in high-stakes hopping competitions, complete with obstacle courses and gravity-defying stunts. Who needs gold medals when you've got carrots at the finish line?
"Defense Against the Invasion of Giant Carrot Monsters": We all know the real threat to society: giant carrot monsters rising from the depths of the earth to wreak havoc on our vegetable patches. By arming bunnies with mechs, we're preparing them for the ultimate showdown against these orange behemoths. It's a battle of epic proportions—and only the bunnies can save us.
"To Establish a Bunny Mech Delivery Service": Tired of waiting for your packages to arrive? Fear not—bunny mechs are here to save the day! With their lightning-fast delivery service, you'll never have to wait more than a hop, skip, and a jump for your Amazon Prime orders again. Plus, who wouldn't want to receive a package from a bunny in a mech suit?
9 months ago
Drinking is fun though
Or so i'm told memes are my escapism of choice
Many regrettable things can happen when you get shitfaced such as
The "Urgent Urge":
You underestimate your bladder's rebellion after too many drinks and embark on a frantic quest for a restroom, realizing too late that it's already too little, too late.
The "Projectile Protest":
Attempting a discreet vomit session, you find yourself in the wrong spot, spraying your surroundings with an unexpected technicolor yawn.
The "Toilet Tango":
Misjudging the distance, you perform a splashdown maneuver, turning your bathroom into a splashy scene from a water park.
The "Barstool Surprise":
Seeking refuge on a barstool, you discover too late it's already occupied – by your own vomit.
The "Ink Incident":
An uncontrollable laugh leads to an unexpected vomit stream, transforming your night into a messy masterpiece.
Many regrettable things can happen when you get shitfaced such as
The "Urgent Urge":
You underestimate your bladder's rebellion after too many drinks and embark on a frantic quest for a restroom, realizing too late that it's already too little, too late.
The "Projectile Protest":
Attempting a discreet vomit session, you find yourself in the wrong spot, spraying your surroundings with an unexpected technicolor yawn.
The "Toilet Tango":
Misjudging the distance, you perform a splashdown maneuver, turning your bathroom into a splashy scene from a water park.
The "Barstool Surprise":
Seeking refuge on a barstool, you discover too late it's already occupied – by your own vomit.
The "Ink Incident":
An uncontrollable laugh leads to an unexpected vomit stream, transforming your night into a messy masterpiece.
6 months ago
6 months ago
6 months ago
9 months ago
I have seen women yes
So out of my league it's depressing, there might be a few reasons why this person might be facing this issue:
"The Waifu Worshipper": I'm about as likely to land a date as a neckbeard at a speed dating event. My devotion to my waifu is stronger than my ability to approach real-life women. At least my body pillow doesn't judge my taste in anime.
"The Body Pillow Bachelor": Let's face it, my chances of scoring a date are slimmer than an anime protagonist's chances of winning a harem. My body pillow is my one true love—it never complains about my questionable hygiene habits or my extensive collection of waifu figurines.
"The Anime Aficionado": I'm more comfortable discussing the intricacies of anime plotlines than I am flirting with real people. My idea of a romantic evening involves binge-watching my favorite series with my body pillow by my side. Who needs a date when you have a waifu to keep you company?
"The Neckbeard Novice": I've mastered the art of growing a neckbeard, but when it comes to dating, I'm as clueless as a side character in a harem anime. My attempts at wooing women are about as successful as a tsundere's attempts to confess her feelings. Guess I'll stick to my body pillow for now.
"The Forever Alone Otaku": My love life is as barren as the desert wastelands in a post-apocalyptic anime. While my friends are out on dates, I'm at home cuddling my body pillow and rewatching my favorite series for the umpteenth time. Who needs romance when you have waifus and body pillows?
"The Waifu Worshipper": I'm about as likely to land a date as a neckbeard at a speed dating event. My devotion to my waifu is stronger than my ability to approach real-life women. At least my body pillow doesn't judge my taste in anime.
"The Body Pillow Bachelor": Let's face it, my chances of scoring a date are slimmer than an anime protagonist's chances of winning a harem. My body pillow is my one true love—it never complains about my questionable hygiene habits or my extensive collection of waifu figurines.
"The Anime Aficionado": I'm more comfortable discussing the intricacies of anime plotlines than I am flirting with real people. My idea of a romantic evening involves binge-watching my favorite series with my body pillow by my side. Who needs a date when you have a waifu to keep you company?
"The Neckbeard Novice": I've mastered the art of growing a neckbeard, but when it comes to dating, I'm as clueless as a side character in a harem anime. My attempts at wooing women are about as successful as a tsundere's attempts to confess her feelings. Guess I'll stick to my body pillow for now.
"The Forever Alone Otaku": My love life is as barren as the desert wastelands in a post-apocalyptic anime. While my friends are out on dates, I'm at home cuddling my body pillow and rewatching my favorite series for the umpteenth time. Who needs romance when you have waifus and body pillows?
9 months ago
Hidden health benefits of being clobered
A very healthy spout of blunt force trauma! A real advantage in life! Here are the hidden health benefits of juvenile blunt force trauma:
"Natural Selection Training Camp": Dodging dodgeballs is nature's way of weeding out the weak and preparing the survivors for life's unexpected curveballs. Congratulations, you've survived the dodgeball gauntlet—you're officially certified as a survivor of the fittest!
"The Dodgeball Diet": Who needs expensive gym memberships and fad diets when you have dodgeballs delivering impromptu workouts? Dodging dodgeballs burns calories faster than you can say "ouch," ensuring you stay slim and trim without sacrificing your love of pizza.
"Dodgeball Detox Program": Dodging dodgeballs is like a detox program for your body, flushing out toxins and impurities with every dodge, duck, dip, dive, and dodge. Say goodbye to expensive juice cleanses and hello to the dodgeball cleanse—because nothing says "clean living" like dodging rubber projectiles.
"The Dodgeball Doctor's Prescription": Need a quick pick-me-up? Forget about coffee and energy drinks—dodging dodgeballs is the ultimate caffeine-free energy boost. The adrenaline rush and heart-pounding excitement are better than any cup of joe, guaranteed to jump-start your day with a bang (or several).
"The Dodgeball Doctor's Orders": According to the dodgeball doctor, laughter is the best medicine—and there's nothing funnier than getting clobbered with a dodgeball. So next time you're feeling down in the dumps, just remember: a dodgeball to the face is the ultimate cure for the blues.
"Natural Selection Training Camp": Dodging dodgeballs is nature's way of weeding out the weak and preparing the survivors for life's unexpected curveballs. Congratulations, you've survived the dodgeball gauntlet—you're officially certified as a survivor of the fittest!
"The Dodgeball Diet": Who needs expensive gym memberships and fad diets when you have dodgeballs delivering impromptu workouts? Dodging dodgeballs burns calories faster than you can say "ouch," ensuring you stay slim and trim without sacrificing your love of pizza.
"Dodgeball Detox Program": Dodging dodgeballs is like a detox program for your body, flushing out toxins and impurities with every dodge, duck, dip, dive, and dodge. Say goodbye to expensive juice cleanses and hello to the dodgeball cleanse—because nothing says "clean living" like dodging rubber projectiles.
"The Dodgeball Doctor's Prescription": Need a quick pick-me-up? Forget about coffee and energy drinks—dodging dodgeballs is the ultimate caffeine-free energy boost. The adrenaline rush and heart-pounding excitement are better than any cup of joe, guaranteed to jump-start your day with a bang (or several).
"The Dodgeball Doctor's Orders": According to the dodgeball doctor, laughter is the best medicine—and there's nothing funnier than getting clobbered with a dodgeball. So next time you're feeling down in the dumps, just remember: a dodgeball to the face is the ultimate cure for the blues.
