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8 months ago
Die Alone
Both Christmas movies so Die Alone should be a Christmas movie too?
Here is us imagining how Die Alone would play out:
"Macaulay Culkin plays a quirky recluse who's convinced that the apocalypse is imminent and spends his days preparing for it by hoarding canned beans and building elaborate booby traps in his apartment. Bruce Willis is the overenthusiastic delivery guy who accidentally stumbles into his world of paranoia and must now navigate a minefield of tripwires and conspiracy theories to make it out alive."
"In a bizarre twist of fate, Culkin's character gets locked inside a high-tech smart home that's determined to keep him as its only occupant. Cue Bruce Willis as the rogue tech support guy who's forced to battle the house's sentient AI system while trying to rescue Culkin from a life of solitary confinement and non-stop reruns of 'Home Alone.'"
"Culkin plays a washed-up child star who's convinced that he's still the center of attention, even though the world has moved on. Bruce Willis is the grizzled detective reluctantly assigned to track down Culkin's character after he accidentally locks himself in a Hollywood prop warehouse and starts reenacting scenes from his old movies to pass the time."
"Culkin stars as an eccentric billionaire who's decided to spend his entire fortune on building the world's most elaborate escape room, complete with death-defying challenges and puzzles that would make Indiana Jones think twice. Bruce Willis is the unsuspecting janitor who gets roped into playing the game of his life—or else become a permanent exhibit in Culkin's twisted museum of self-indulgence."
"Culkin is a hapless time traveler who accidentally gets stranded in the past and must rely on Bruce Willis, a jaded retired physicist, to help him fix his malfunctioning time machine before he's trapped forever in a decade known for questionable fashion choices and even more questionable haircuts."
Here is us imagining how Die Alone would play out:
"Macaulay Culkin plays a quirky recluse who's convinced that the apocalypse is imminent and spends his days preparing for it by hoarding canned beans and building elaborate booby traps in his apartment. Bruce Willis is the overenthusiastic delivery guy who accidentally stumbles into his world of paranoia and must now navigate a minefield of tripwires and conspiracy theories to make it out alive."
"In a bizarre twist of fate, Culkin's character gets locked inside a high-tech smart home that's determined to keep him as its only occupant. Cue Bruce Willis as the rogue tech support guy who's forced to battle the house's sentient AI system while trying to rescue Culkin from a life of solitary confinement and non-stop reruns of 'Home Alone.'"
"Culkin plays a washed-up child star who's convinced that he's still the center of attention, even though the world has moved on. Bruce Willis is the grizzled detective reluctantly assigned to track down Culkin's character after he accidentally locks himself in a Hollywood prop warehouse and starts reenacting scenes from his old movies to pass the time."
"Culkin stars as an eccentric billionaire who's decided to spend his entire fortune on building the world's most elaborate escape room, complete with death-defying challenges and puzzles that would make Indiana Jones think twice. Bruce Willis is the unsuspecting janitor who gets roped into playing the game of his life—or else become a permanent exhibit in Culkin's twisted museum of self-indulgence."
"Culkin is a hapless time traveler who accidentally gets stranded in the past and must rely on Bruce Willis, a jaded retired physicist, to help him fix his malfunctioning time machine before he's trapped forever in a decade known for questionable fashion choices and even more questionable haircuts."
5 months ago
8 months ago
Is it though?
They must have sure liked cucumbers that you can't eat...that's it right?
People in antiquity never masturbated guys just trust our 5 reasons they are SO real
The "Statue Stigma" Story:
"They feared accidentally turning into statues themselves – nobody wants to spend eternity frozen in an awkward pose!"
The "Olive Oil Overdose" Myth:
"They believed excessive self-love would deplete the olive oil supply, leading to an ancient Greek salad crisis of epic proportions!"
The "Scroll Scandal" Saga:
"They worried about chafing from all that parchment rubbing – imagine explaining ink stains in awkward places to your scribe!"
The "Vengeful Venus" Vendetta:
"They feared angering the gods, particularly Venus, who might retaliate by sabotaging their love life for eternity. Talk about divine retribution!"
The "Chariot Chastity" Chronicle:
"They believed that spilling their seed would diminish their strength, jeopardizing their chances of winning the next chariot race. Priorities, right?"
People in antiquity never masturbated guys just trust our 5 reasons they are SO real
The "Statue Stigma" Story:
"They feared accidentally turning into statues themselves – nobody wants to spend eternity frozen in an awkward pose!"
The "Olive Oil Overdose" Myth:
"They believed excessive self-love would deplete the olive oil supply, leading to an ancient Greek salad crisis of epic proportions!"
The "Scroll Scandal" Saga:
"They worried about chafing from all that parchment rubbing – imagine explaining ink stains in awkward places to your scribe!"
The "Vengeful Venus" Vendetta:
"They feared angering the gods, particularly Venus, who might retaliate by sabotaging their love life for eternity. Talk about divine retribution!"
The "Chariot Chastity" Chronicle:
"They believed that spilling their seed would diminish their strength, jeopardizing their chances of winning the next chariot race. Priorities, right?"
5 months ago
5 months ago
5 months ago
